Because I could not stop for death....

I got knocked up instead...

Thursday, September 29, 2005

The Parenting Contest

I've come to realize a lot since I had my second daughter. I can't be everywhere, I don't have 6 arms, eyes in the back of my head or a terribly large bladder. I also came to realize that my kids are different, and cool in their own ways. They aren't necessarily "better" than other kids-perhaps they are smarter, or bigger or faster, but are they better?

I sat on the bus today in front of a young mother with her gorgeous little girl who was about 15 months old. It being the bus, and the girl being a young toddler, there were many "sit the bum down" comments. The mother became quite irritated. I KNOW that feeling.

I started feeling superior. MY kid would never be like that (yeah, RIGHT). I wondered if she was going to hit her. She didn't, but I saw that helpless rage burning.

Then I felt like shit. I've been there, so why did I feel so smug?

I see another lady a lot who lives in the low rentals up the road from me. Her kids are likely 7 & 9 maybe, and I think she does it all alone. She yells at them. A LOT. But if it's just her, and she's exhausted and tired and just can't do it anymore, is it bad parenting, or a shitty stick? I felt superior, then I felt terrible for thinking she was a bad Mom. I should have offered helpo instead of thinking the worst of her.

If instead of making it a competition, we helped eachother, wouldn't that be best for everyone?

I've decided that going forward, I will offer my help. I'm sure it will be rebuffed, but the thought counts....

Half of me wanted the yell, the other, offer help. I did neither. I'm


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